Category Archives: Retarded Government

Advice To A Young Comedian Performing Stand-Up At the United Nations

1.  Make sure you perform after the General Assembly has their two-drink minimum, but before they reach drink six.  Hugo Chavez will start heckling you. 2.  Always open with an Angelina Jolie joke.  Her kids call her the High Commissioner For Refugees.  Flood victims cling to her lips for safety.  Something about her boobs.  Boob jokes ...

Continue Reading »

Government Shutdown: Cancun or Daytona Beach?

I find it very interesting that our government is set to shut down just in time for...SPRING BREAK. A coincidence? I think not. After all, children's school schedules dictate the way every other American lives, why not our trusted government officials? I mean, when else are you allowed to take a vacation?  The first week of May?  That's crazy ...

Continue Reading »