I am. The Moustache. You thought I was gone - like that time after the War of 1812. And that time after Studio 64. And that time after Disco. But for once your husband is right. The Fuzzy Facial Caterpillar is renaissancing. Upper-Lip Astroturf has never been so sexy as it is now. Your grandmother knows this. The firemen ...
Category Archives: Utterly Unimportant
Postpartum Postcard: The Holiday Card
It pains me to say that I am a holiday card enthusiast. I am the person I made fun of before I had kids. Several of my single friends place my holiday cards in the center of their dart board or use them as coasters. Because they're blinded by their cuteness. I, myself, am blinded by their cuteness. But ...
Vanity Fair: A Harried Perusal
It arrives. Glossy. Luxe. You can practically smell the perspiration of Annie Leibovitz's genius. You struggle to place the author of the quote on the cover, as you do each and every month. Michel de Montaigne? Hmmm. A famous French DJ in the '80's. Yes, that sounds right. And then the countdown begins until the next issue arrives...GO! DAY 1: ...
The Moms of Jackass: A Salute
You gave them respectable names like Philip John Clapp and Brandon Cole Margera - and did you, I wonder, baptize them and later reflect: "Was that enough?" Did you dress them in sweater vests for a photo with Santa? Did they tell Santa they knew what he did last summer? With that ...
Following The Leader
Like Fleetwood Mac sans love triangle, I have always prided myself on going my own way. And while this did not work to my advantage in middle or high school - as evidenced by my self-choreographed solo to The Bobs singing The Beatles in the dance team spring show - my Shock-and-Awe Campaign is finally paying off. As ...
West Side Flame-Broiled Story
In-N-Out Burger. Friday night. 11:00 p.m. The whitest county in America. __________________________ JET SONG (or Why You Should Join Chorus): CLEARASIL: Against the a-capella club, we need every man we got. AXE: Tony don't belong no more. CLEARASIL: Cut it, Axe-Body-Spray-Boy, I and Tony started the High School Choral Ensemble. AXE: Well, he acts like he ...
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Jen @ Blue Yonder Design 
